PETA to Sue Individuals and Publications who Liken Politicians to Dogs
International animal rights group PETA has released a statement saying they will file legal complaints against individuals who compare politicians to dogs.
Andanar Uncovers Plot of Hackers to Sit Back and Watch PNA Embarrass Itself
We have a reason to believe that these individuals are sitting in their homes, watching as we embarrass ourselves, said Andanar.
2018 Intelligence Budget to be Increased to Make Up for Stupid Officials
The increase in the intelligence budget would hopefully make up for the stupidity of some key government officials.
Cayetano Condemns Gilas’ Vengeful Win Against China
Foreign Secretary Cayetano vented his intense disapproval over the win of the Philippines against China, calling it a provocation.
Bystander Who Joked About Raping Kitty Duterte Found Dead in Davao City
A bystander who casually joked about raping presidential daughter Veronica “Kitty” Duterte was found dead in a ditch in Davao City.
Marcos Jr. Returns 66 Million of Stolen Money to Government
In an attempt to gain the VP seat, currently unemployed Bongbong Marcos returned 66 million pesos of their family’s stolen money to the government.
Sen. Villar’s Study Finds Unli-Rice More Dangerous than Chain Smoking
A research conducted by Senator Villar finds that people who have been eating more than 2 cups of rice per meal are more unhealthy than chain smokers.
China to Send Instant Noodles to Soldiers in Marawi
The Chinese government has answered the United States’ technical assistance to the Philippines with 500 kilograms of instant noodles.
Napoles Tags Pope Francis in Pork Barrel Scam
DOJ Secretary Vitaliano Aguirre hinted at the possible involvement of Pope Francis in the pork barrel scam as relayed by the legal counsel of Janet Napoles.
Bato dela Rosa to Star on ‘Ang Probinsyano‘
Philippine National Police chief Director Ronald ‘Bato’ dela Rosa revealed Monday that he will soon be on the hit TV show Ang Probinsyano.
Supposedly Beheaded Police Chief Fired by Duterte for Being Alive
President Duterte fired a police chief he believed to have been beheaded by the Maute group after the police himself told the press that he is alive.
Lt. Col. Marcelino: Wearing Uniform Makes Me Look More Innocent
Lt. Col. Ferdinand Marcelino says wearing his uniform in all his public appearances and media interviews has paid off with all charges against him dropped.
DOTr Orders Removal of Windshield Wipers for Distracting Drivers
The DOTr has ordered the removal of windshield wipers from all kinds of vehicles around the country in line with the Anti-Distracted Driving Act.
Abella Says Duterte Was Only Joking When He Said Mocha Was Bright
Presidential Spokesperson Ernesto Abella answered several questions about President Duterte’s praising of Mocha Uson, saying he was only joking as usual.
Malacañang Hires Mocha Uson to Surf Facebook All Day
Malacañang has decided to hire sexy performer Mocha Uson to do exactly what she already does but with a lot better pay and benefits.
On Sexist Jokes: Duterte Advises Sotto to Become President First
President Rodrigo Duterte has only one advice for Senator Tito Sotto after the latter has been under fire for his sexist remarks against single mothers: become a president first. Or… Read more »
SolGen Calida: Convicted Drug Lords More Credible than Self-Confessed Assassins
Solicitor General Jose Calida merely laughed at the case filed before the ICC, calling the supposed witnesses as murderers with no credibility.
Duterte Says LRT and MRT Troubles Caused by Drugs
Responding to the consecutive troubles of both LRT and MRT, President Duterte once again reiterated the importance of his war on drugs
Duterte Supporters Come Back from Vacation with Renewed Hatred for Opposition
Duterte supporters who came from vacation returned to their normal lives with renewed hatred for government opposition.
Hip Millenial Asks for Forgiveness in Advance for Partying and Engaging in Premarital Sex Tonight
Cruz has always loved partying but since it is Good Friday and she has made a pledge last year, she spent the holy day in prayer.
Another Earthquake: Administration Uncovers Literal Destabilization Plot Against Malacañang
A massive literal destabilization has been exposed by the administration in the form of a series of earthquakes around Metro Manila.
Report: April Fools’ Day No Longer Fun with All the Bullshit Happening Regularly
A recent survey suggests that people no longer find April Fools’ Day a crazy day that can be taken in jest due to the regular occurrence of bullshit.
NPA Holds Job Fair Along EDSA
Revolutionary Group NPA held a surprise job fair today along EDSA in Cubao, Quezon City in relation to the group’s 48th anniversary.
China Only Interested in Buying Uninhabited Philippine Territories
DOT Secretary Wanda Teo confirmed that they are indeed selling the Philippines to China albeit with difficulty.
Single Woman Firmly Asserts Strength and Independence on Facebook
In a series of 27 consecutive Facebook posts, 28-year-old Dana Cruz strongly asserted being a strong and independent woman.